TIME for the February challenge for WEP. The prompt is - What's in a face?
What comes to your mind - a ghost story? A treatise on the scientific dimensions of the
face? a poignant poem? A photo that captures the face? Artwork? Whatever strikes you as inspiration, go for
it!
February 14 is Valentine's Day.
You are welcome to incorporate this romantic day, but it is not mandatory! Just
remember to keep your flash fiction or non-fiction to approx. 1,000 words.
Here is my flash fiction:
MASK
George
looked across the street at the steamy windows of the small café opposite. He checked his watch, a few more minutes he
thought before he would stroll over there.
The
bell chimed as he opened the door of the bijoux bistro, the smell of freshly
ground coffee assailed his senses. Lucy,
the waitress, smiled at him.
‘Your
usual, George?’ Lucy was already reaching for a cup.
‘Please. I’ll take the window seat over there,’ he
pointed towards the end of the café.
Lucy nodded her approval. ‘I’ll
bring it over to you. Do you want a
pastry? Freshly baked half an hour ago
by Mary’s fair hand, go on, spoil yourself, George.’ Lucy tried to persuade him to eat something,
George was far too thin and it wouldn't hurt him to have a bit more meat on his
bones.
George
smiled his thanks as he shook his head declining the lovely treat. He settled at the table gazing out of the
window at the place where he had been standing just a few minutes ago.
The
tall office building with its glazed windows stared blankly out at the
world. He wondered what secrets lived
behind those panes of glass, what went on as people arrived at work regular as
clockwork to join the rat race. It was
something he was very familiar with.
He
glanced at the large clock on the wall, 6.20 p.m. Only a few more minutes he promised
himself.
Photo credit: Sally Stackhouse
He
sipped the coffee Lucy had placed by his side; he scalded his tongue, as he
always did. He removed the sachets of
sugar from the saucer and smiled as he unwrapped the biscuits Lucy had placed
there. He glanced over at her, she was
serving behind the counter but felt his gaze, he smiled his thanks to Lucy who
acknowledged him with a subtle wink.
George’s
attention was taken up by the exodus of the office workers from the large
building opposite. Men and women in
business suits rushing every which way to catch their trains and buses, some
lingered for a few minutes saying their farewells. A group of young ladies bustled across the
road and entered the café, laughing and jostling each other gently as they
settled at a larger table.
From
George’s vantage point he could see a young lady, brunette, in her mid 20’s
with a lovely smile and a vivacious way about her. He pulled out some papers from inside his jacket
pocket and glanced at the photograph therein.
It was an image of a young woman of a similar age to the girl opposite
him enjoying a conversation with her friends.
Their
refreshments came, delivered by Lucy with a cheery smile. The girls had drinks and some of those
delicious pastries that had been offered to him. George wondered whether he should order one
now so that he could stay longer and enjoy his position of eavesdropping.
Lucy
caught his eye, raised an eyebrow quizzically and he nodded his order. She was such a dear. He knew she worked hard as a single mum
bringing up her two teenage sons; sometimes they came in at the end of school
to wait to walk home with her. They were
turning in to thoughtful young gentlemen.
He
bit into the delicious pastry, brushing the golden flakes from his jumper and patting
his mouth with the paper serviette supplied on the plate. He glanced over again to the table containing
the young office workers. They had been
joined now by a couple of male colleagues.
A
booming voice cackled out laughter, rather falsely in George’s opinion. He was obviously one of those Hooray-Henry's
you found at boarding school, had probably got his position because his father
knew somebody at the company across the road.
Lucy
appeared at his table to clear the plates and noticed the photograph. She looked at the photograph then at George
and then across the room focusing on one of the young women seated there. George placed his hand gently on Lucy’s arm;
she immediately sat down beside him as she noticed his eyes were rather red and
watery.
Her
nearness and quiet comforted him until he felt ready to speak. He cleared his throat, turned his head to
look at Lucy and said softly, ‘I think she may be my granddaughter. I was sent this photograph by a ‘well wisher’
last year with the address of your café.
That is why I come here once a week and over the last few months I’ve
noticed this young lady and felt a connection.
Tell me I’m being a silly old man.’
George’s eyes pleaded with Lucy to deny this.
Lucy
looked at the photograph. She shook her
head. ‘It’s so difficult when you can’t
see all of her face,’ she said puzzled.
‘There does seem to be something familiar about her though, I must
agree.’
George
nodded and swallowed hard. ‘I don't know
what to do. I don't want to upset her
life but if she is my granddaughter then ......’ his voice tapered off.
Lucy
said, ‘shall I try and find out for you?’
‘Oh
no, my dear, that’s too much trouble for you,’ replied George.
‘Leave
it with me, I have an idea.’
The
following week George was there again waiting in his seat for the young office
women to come in to the café. He
noticed Lucy’s boys were already seated at a table, using the Wi-Fi connection
for their homework.
Tom,
Lucy’s eldest boy, dashed to open the door of the café to allow the girls to
enter. A bit of banter ensued and the
boys were invited to join the girls for a coffee.
So
that was Lucy’s idea, to get her boys to find out more for him. He was lucky to have such a wonderful friend
as Lucy.
He
was sure she was his granddaughter. He
would swear those eyes they were the same as her mother’s.
Photo credit: Sally Stackhouse
What a lovely story ~ I was dying to know if indeed she is the grand daughter ~ Some mystery in here too ~ Thanks for sharing ~
ReplyDeleteFebruary 15th, 2014
ReplyDeleteDear Sally,
Thank you so much for reading and commenting on my story for 'What's in a face', about Marcy and Julie.
You have written a delightful tale of suspense about longing and friendship!
You keep the reader wondering what George's intention are. At first he seems sinister. Could he be a private detective? Or a hit man? But slowly you reveal his fine qualities: He is just patiently looking for his long lost granddaughter. And the character of the waitress Lucy is wonderful. What a thoughtful, kind and generous person she is.
And you have not let anything go to waste. Lucy uses her sons to solve the mystery!
The photo at the end shows us why George had difficulty matching the photo with the girl. It leaves the ending with some doubt. But the idea is that Lucy's sons can get the girl to reveal her true identity. We all hope and imagine this in our minds. Great flash fiction!
If you were to work this into a larger work, you would naturally reveal a little more, because the characters would continue the story somehow.
You're such a clever story-teller, Sally!
Best wishes,
Anna
Sally, I love this ~ the mystery, the friendliness of the cafe scene with which I am very familiar , the tactile feel with the coffee, the pastries, the cafeatmosphere. I was waiting to see if the mystery was solved. I'm glad you kept us guessing.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you're back! I hope things have settled down after a sad time.
Thanks for posting for WEP .
Denise
Oh very nice, I like bittersweet stories, and I hope they get to meet. I know of a couple who searched for their daughter, whom they had given up for adoption. It's hard when families are split and connections get frayed. Well done.
ReplyDeleteThe reveal is very enjoyable, I felt sure George was a hitman then turns out he might be the grandfather. You've captured the cafe scene very well, and the suspenseful ending is perfect.
ReplyDeleteI like the plot development. Does George discover the identity of the young lady? I'm curious.
ReplyDeleteWill you be continuing with the story?