Tuesday, 6 March 2012

The Great Divide

Second Campaigner Challenge (of my Fourth Campaign, February 2012)



Prompt 1:

Two people are sitting together under the remains of a concrete bridge. Their backs are against a rusted bridge support.  One person's leg is cut.  The other person has wet hair.
 
I decided to compose a poem using the prompts in less than 200 words

THE GREAT DIVIDE
Jill’s long wet ginger hair cascaded down her back
She turned her face to her brother Jack
His bleeding knee was covered with orange rust
Disrupted as they fell from the broken bridge trusses.
They leant back gathering their strength against the remaining concrete wall.
Across the river they could see a boy chasing his ball
Along the sunlight path shadows flitting through the balustrade
No cares in the world, he didn't seem to be afraid
Nothing lay before him of danger in the outside world.
On the other side of the stream were young urchins
Searching and seeking treasures to auction
At the great festival held in honour of the candy floss bosses
Magically suspended in centrifugal forces
The shimmering confection suspended upside down on a wooden ladle

Promises of sweet aromas to savour leading into transportation of delights
Losing themselves in the incandescent luminous patterns that excites
All their senses and leaves the body bereft and the soul wanting more
Jack and Jill held hands and sighed together as they knew no cure
The power and the influence of the great human race divided
As spirit energies came down into their world crashed and collided.

 

19 comments:

  1. The imagery and word choice is wonderful. It has a really nice flow to it.Good job!

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  2. Wonderful job including all of the prompts. And I'm always in awe of those who write poetry. Nice job!

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  3. Doing this prompt as a poem is the hardest thing. Good for you! (#30)

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  4. I enjoyed reading this but does not feel like poetry - more prose poem perhaps - well done
    #48

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  5. Love it. The poetry prompt would def be the most difficult. Good for you doing it and succeeding all the way. :D

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  6. I totally like prose poetry--I think it's better than poetry, lol...cause I can't write the other stuff! Good job!

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  7. How. Clever. Is. This. ??? Lovely work here! Poetry is so beyond me! Such a lovely use of words all around :D "Liked"

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  8. WOW! How great. I envy people who can write good poetry. Very nicely done.

    Michelle #74
    www.michelle-pickett.com/blog

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  9. Thanks for all your comments, I really appreciate you taking the time. It was a really difficult challenge and there have been some great entries.

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  10. Beautiful imagery! I love the way you used all the prompts. Well done!

    BTW, it's Susan from My Withershins. I often have to comment using this old account because sometimes Blogspot won't let me use Wordpress to comment. Thanks for dropping by and commenting on mine, too. :)

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  11. Just dropping back by to let you know that I tagged you for the Lucky 7 Meme over at my blog!

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  12. Really enjoyed reading your words. I am so jealous of people who create more than a scene with their words, but who create an atmosphere and project a scene within the scene. Very nicely done, I've got to give you a 'like' for this.

    Kevin, (#19)

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  13. Congratulations! You have been shortlisted to move onto stage two

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    Replies
    1. Oooh exciting, thank you so much.

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  14. Very nice entry. Good use of the prompts.
    Melissa Maygrove #14

    Consider turning of word verification. I posted on this today on my blog, if you need instructions. ; )

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  15. Wonderful poem! Well done getting all the prompts in there as well.

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  16. I liked how you worked ALL of the prompts into a poem - impressive! And I think this is the first time I've seen that wooden ladle picture referred to as candy floss - it really does look like that.

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  17. Candy floss--takes me back to yesterday's fairs. Great job!!

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